i art a day.

As I sit here munching on a fresh fruit pastry cream tart, some cheese and baguette, and watching a white rabbit wearing a waistcoat run across the television screen waving a pocket watch I can’t help but wonder where the time’s gone here in the real world. 28 days was unimaginably short, but has been nice as well. I’ve eaten a fair amount of cheese, read Harry Potter, visited my parents for several days, played Mario Galaxy, baked some tasty tarts and even gotten a manicure.

Tomorrow classes begin again for my third quarter of Baking & Pastry School, and I’m thrilled that they’re all in the evening. Waking up at 7am just isn’t my thing as hard as I try. Goodbye summer break, it’s been grand:

This morning I rolled out of bed at 6:45 am – after being in bed for exactly 3 hours – took the dog out and took myself to school. I was surprisingly animated and surprisingly on time, early even. As I walked into class and pulled a stool up to the baker’s bench, waiting for the rest of the class and the Chef to arrive a nervousness began to take hold. This is it. The FINAL final of this quarter. You smell that? It’s freedom and it’s only an hour away…just try not to fail.

I’ve never really had test anxiety. Even in architecture school I had no problem getting up in front of 30 people and talking about my designs. But this is different. I can’t talk my way out of this one with clever ideas and vague theories. You either know how to make Creme Anglaise or you don’t.

And just like that, it was over. 2 pages, 35 minutes, 100% on my notebook, and a flattering vote of confidence from the Chef and I was home free. A trip to DiBruno Brothers for 1/2 pound of Delice de Bourgogne and a baguette was definitely in order. Over the next 28 days I intend to:

I can hardly wait!!! While I’m completely in love with my classes it’s going to be so nice to focus a little on just me and the things that I want/need to do to relax a little. How is everyone else’s summer going? Any big plans?

Folks, it’s been a pretty rough week. I wanted to put my life worries away, sit down and write a longer post about all of my furry creatures, but I’m staring at the clock thinking about how much school work I’ve got ahead of me. No Bueno.

As it goes, there’s only two more weeks of school left. I’ve got two projects to finish, 2 notebooks to type up, one take home “exam” (okay – it’s really just making sourdough bread, which is pretty effing sweet), and a LOT of studying to do. I should be able to get it all done, but the longer posts will have to wait till next week. Needless to say, Sunday can’t really come soon enough.

Hopefully after this quarter is up I’ll have plenty of time and a little extra sanity to iron out some of the rough areas of my life. There’s always a bright side though, and things can only get better, right? I feel like Jay-Z…

wallet by thetinderbox

Living with a tighter budget has been on my mind a lot these days, but it’s been a bit of a struggle trying to make myself cut back. Every magazine’s got a thousand tips on how to save money, but the How to buy in bulk and Where to get the best deals on your new shoes articles aren’t really fitting for me. I live in a house with one other person, and we’re lucky to get through all of the fresh foods in the house before they go bad – and we go shopping weekly. New shoes/clothes/jewelry/electronics/appliances/big ticket items? Please, I wear t-shirts 6 days a week in a kitchen and rent my place.

wallet by munchmoney

So I’ve been reading up as much as possible and doing some brain storming to try and figure out how to get on the right track. Here’s what I’ve started with:

1. Get my latte budget under control. I’d say I buy a coffee about 5 days a week, and I’m not satisfied with a regular black coffee from a roach coach, but a fancy steamed & frothed milk espresso based concoction. So assuming each of these drinks is about $4 x 5 drinks = $20 a week/$80 month. Luckily, my mom gave me her little 1 cup home espresso machine a while ago, and I could honestly be doing this stuff at home. So, coffee at $7 a can (two week’s worth) from Trader Joe’s, Milk & vanilla or chocolate syrup which I’ve got already, I’ve cut back about $66.

2. Get my parking budget under control. This quarter at school I’ve gotten pretty lazy about sleeping in and driving in to school, paying for parking, and watching all of my funds rapidly decreasing. 5 days a week x $14 a day = $70 a week/$280 a month. OH MY! It’s true, driving & parking in a city is such a bad choice. Taking the subway on the other hand only costs about $20 per week, which ultimately saves about $200. It’s pretty much a no-brainer, and I don’t have the “but it’s so COLD” excuse anymore.

clutch by thewren

3. Eat everything in the fridge. I’m not entirely sure how much money I’m wasting on food that goes uneaten, but every time I clean out the refrigerator and throw containers still half-full out I start to get a little upset that I’ve forgotten what’s in there and let perfectly good foods go bad. Sure, some of it’s good for composting, but that’s not what I’m buying it for. The biggest offenders are:

Veggies – A bag of lettuce is pretty much doomed when I buy it. I’ll either forget that it’s in there entirely or make myself one or two salads before it goes bad. To combat this we’ve planted lettuce, tomatoes, and a variety of herbs and fruits in the back yard. That way we can pick them when we’re hungry and while it’s above freezing we’ve got fresh foods at our fingertips.

Heavy Cream/Buttermilk/Eggs/Dairy – Most of this stuff I buy for baking purposes, but hardly ever take the time to check and make sure I’m out before I buy more. The solution here is obvious. Make sure I’m out or running out before I pick more up.

4. Finish art projects before buying more art supplies. I’ve got so many art supplies we’ve dedicated a whole room of the house to them – the largest room at that. I’ve got so many art supplies that even though we’ve got a whole room dedicated to them, they often get spread out in the living room, dining room, and bedroom. It’s ridiculous. I’m making a vow right now to wrap some of these millions of projects up before I spend another penny on even more supplies.

wallet by kukubee

5. Go to the library. A couple of weeks ago I went to the library at school to do some research on a project, and was blown away. Cookbooks and magazines and…other cool books everywhere! I’d totally forgotten how fantastic the library was, and immediately checked out 5 books. I’m sure I spend at least $50 a month at Barnes & Noble, and while I’m all about stimulating the economy – perhaps I can cut back to just one book a month form the store, and catch up on all of those other books that I’d just like to thumb through or copy a couple of recipes out of at the library (school or public). As far as magazines go – why toss $5 per issue when I should either subscribe for $15 for the year or read them for free in the library as well? Good idea.

Feel free to share your thrifty ideas – the more the better!

While most people I know are winding down their weeks come Friday, looking forward to a weekend of chores, day trips, relaxation, and personal projects, I operate on a bit of a different schedule. Sunday is my day off, usually spent trying (uselessly) to clean the house or have a marathon laundry washing.

But this weekend, Memorial Day weekend for us in the US, is a gift I’ve been waiting for for weeks. Three whole days off from school! The good people over at the Art Institute have given me Friday, Monday AND Tuesday off for the holiday weekend and it couldn’t be more appreciated than it is by me.

So far today I’ve:

- Rolled around in bed, relishing the feel of the sheets around me and enjoying the fact that I wasn’t on my feet – until 12:30 in the afternoon.

- Made cheese eggs for brunch with a glass of sweet tea to wash it down, and proceeded to sit in my slowly developing garden to eat my tasty eggs.

- Read through about half of Breakfast at Tiffany’s that my dad gave me a copy of, and dreamed of New York City.

- Walked to the mail box to drop off some bills and Netflix movies, the thrift store to drop off a bag of things & browse, and the coffee shop for a brew (that was actually disappointing, and made my own when I got home).

- Tidied up the living room.

In all honesty, it’s been a more productive than I thought it would be. I’ve also been daydreaming about another day off I’ll have very soon, and decided to take myself up to Brooklyn to finally attend a Renegade Craft Show!

I’ll only be able to make it on Sunday the 6th, but I’m very excited nonetheless. (Cue Billy Joel’s New York State of Mind) I’ll be hopping on a bus early that Sunday morning to get myself to Brooklyn by no later than noon. After the fair I intend to hit up as many famous bakeries as I can in the Brooklyn/Lower Manhattan area for ideas, inspiration, and of course SWEETS!

It’s been over a year since I’ve been up to New York, which really is a sin for someone who lives as close as I do. It really only takes about an hour and a half to get up there, and a $20 round trip bus ticket (that drops me off Madison Square Garden!) It’s been nearly 2 and a half years since I’ve been to Brooklyn, so the time has come. I love a good day off, and I think I’m finally learning to really appreciate them.

Once upon a time I tried to make cream puffs, but ended up with…

Burnt, eggy tasting, and most unevenly puffed, I tossed the whole batch and avoided making them again fearing that I may never get the hang of it.

Usually when faced with a challenge that I imagine I’m going to fail at (either because I’ve tried already and failed or I’m just a ninny) I’ll put it off for about as long as possible. I’m sure I’m not the only one out there who does this, but over the past five or so years I’ve realized that I’ve made sort of a habit out of it. It’s not just simple procrastination, although laziness is an anchor constantly trying to drag me under while waves of anxiety wash over me. I think it’s more of an inferiority complex masquerading as a superiority complex or something.

I mean, I’ll do something (a project, a job, anything) that I’m really pleased with and that seems to please someone else, and then I’ll think to myself – what if I can’t do this again? What if I can’t work up to this level all of the time? Worse yet, what if it was just a fluke and now these people think I’m actually good at this but I’m really not. And I reel. I’ll put it off again, sacrificing the good opinions of those around me and fulfilling my worst assumptions that I’ll chalk up to not really being capable in the first place.

About two months after the Choux burning debacle, with at least two more supervised attempts at making these deceptively simple pastries successfully produced, I told a friend I’d make him a batch…to serve to other people no less. 50 other people actually.

Why is it that it’s so easy to believe in our faults with little to no objection, but our merits and achievements are often hard to swallow? I’m not talking modesty and humility here – but serious flaws in self confidence.

Luckily, what I lack in confidence and actual skill I make up for in fortitude (at least when it comes to those things I’m truly passionate about). Saturday night I mixed up my frist batch of Pate au Choux, piped about 24 cream puffs out onto two baking sheets, and slid them into the 425 degree oven. I flipped the oven light on, sat down in front of it and waited…

…for fourty minutes, with my eyes glued to the glass like it was the last episode of LOST or something. It was life or death. Rising or collapsing all hung in the balance of those fragile puffs starting to brown in my oven. Would I be Jenny the Pastry Mistress Extraordinaire or that girl who pretends to know what she’s doing in the kitchen but will have to buy some puffs at the grocery store at 8am as not to disappoint her friends?

And out they came…

As they cooled they didn’t collapse, but got slightly crunchier, just how they were supposed to be. And the next batch came out light golden brown with well developed air pockets and crunchy exteriors as well. And the third batch too!

So I whipped up a batch of chocolate mousse, filling part of the puffs with such a decadent treat and drizzling tempered chocolate over them. Then a bowl of traditional pastry cream was cooked and cooled, and filled the second batch of puffs. By the time the third batch of puffs were baked I couldn’t help but get a little playful and try out the cream puff swan:

Luckily, heavy cream is a staple in my refrigerator these days, and after filling the swans with pastry cream they were topped with whipped cream and sprinkled with confectioner’s sugar. Sure, I fancy them more like squatting ostriches, but they came out just the way I had intended.

I’ve kept a mental checklist of those things that I have been or am still too afraid to really tackle. Personally anyway (if not professionally as well) I think I’ve moved cream puffs from the “What if I can’t really do this” column and squarely into the “I’ve got this” column. And I didn’t come home with any leftovers to make me think otherwise.

I don’t know if you noticed or not, but January is over already! At the beginning of every new year I always assume that things are going to slow down, and then woosh! another month has disappeared. So, while February’s still fresh I wanted to take a quick look back at my New Year’s Resolutions, just to make sure I haven’t entirely forgotten them yet (probably not till June).

1. Get organized. Lists made, certain rooms & ideas brainstormed (on paper even!) Small moves made towards the big goal. CHECK.

2. Listen to more music. In January I picked up several cds, and started listening to the handful that I received as gifts over the holidays. Found a couple of new loves, a couple of unheard albums of those I already love, and filled in some of the musical archives. CHECK. At the moment I’m listening to:

3. Keep a sketchbook. I think I’ve managed to fill in a couple of pages of the sketchbook, but it’s a far cry from the several sketches a week I was intending on by that resolution. On the other hand, I’ve doodled across every page of my notes from classes. I almost forgot how much I enjoyed sketching and doodling in the margins during a lecture, it makes it all go by so much smoother (and yes, I’m still listening and taking notes). I’ve also picked up a couple of visual candy books, which I may take the time to review here sometime. All of that aside, I want to force myself to get it in the book. So, as of yet that resolution remains unfulfilled.

In other news, baking & pastry school is going really well so far – I’m totally in love with it. I’m also getting uncharacteristically excited about Valentine’s day. Hopefully soon I’ll have a little focus and update you all about it soon. Time to head back out to class, ciao!

photo by epheminist

Last night while the lights and confetti flashed across the screen from Times Square and our plastic cups clinked I couldn’t help but breathe a sigh of relief that 2009 was finally over, and hope – with cautious optimism – that 2010 will bring something else, something better. I’ve been considering the next twelve months and how I’d like for them to differ from the last twelve. In some cases, there are very clear things that I’d like to try or do differently, and in others there’s more of just a general feeling about how I’d like things to be. See, 2009 hasn’t exactly been the most enjoyable year. Each season brought a new hurdle and tried my patience as well as endurance. At the same time, there were plenty of great things that happened, not to be totally overshadowed by the not so memorable events.

To dwell on the low points of 2009 would seem like moving in the wrong direction, but the high points are definitely worth a quick recap:

+ Celebrated 2 year anniversary with the Boyf.
+ Moved into a large townhouse (with the Boyf) complete with a studio space!
+ Travelled to Minnesota to see an incredibly lovely friend, separated by distance and 11 years. (It was absolutely AWESOME!)
+ Went camping in the “Gorges” Ithaca, NY and had a blast.
+ Got a fantastic new laptop <3
+ Met some brilliant new people
+ Participated in & won a small local design competition.
+ Travelled to South Carolina to spend the holidays with my dear family.
+ Got accepted to Baking & Pastry school!!!

I have no idea what 2010 will hold, and I’ve learned that there are some things you just can’t control. But, this new year there’s a couple of things I’d like to do for myself, that could or should help me with anything that’s in store.

It’s time to get organized. Organize my space – organize my finances – organize my time – organize me life. Spaces to organize include my 1. my studio space 2. the kitchen 3. the bathroom 4. the bedroom. Probably in that order. It’s so important these days to get it together for several reasons. First and foremost, it’s so much easier to work and create in a clean and well organized space. Secondly, my very adventurous kitten will be less prone to accidently spilling / stepping on / jumping on / destroying something if it’s put away and tidy. Probably. I have no idea what I’ll need to do in the way of school work, but chances are being organized won’t hurt.

It’s time to turn up the music. Once upon a time I listened to music every free minute I had. It was entertaining, relaxing, and emotional. The loudest scream rock and the softest electronic rhythms struck chords in my mind and resonated throughout my days. It helped inspire and center me, and it’s something that I’m truly lacking these days. Ideally, I’d like to listen to something new (to me) each week.

Chances are I can’t afford to buy a new cd once a week but there’s the radio and artist websites and well, my friends & family’s recommendations. I’m looking at classics, new stuff, and everything in between. No genre should be left untouched. Thankfully, an iTunes gift card that I received for Christmas will be getting me started!

It’s time to put pen to paper. Keep a sketchbook. I had to do it in art school. I had to do it in high school. I had to do it in college. Any personal sketchbook that I’ve ever kept has been well used. Sure, the drive to draw comes and goes, but the more I draw, the more I’m driven to it. So I’m endeavoring to make at least two sketches a week. Perhaps while I’m listening to a new record! I’m not even requiring myself to make any special effort with a sketch. A simple line drawing is just as important to me as the most intensive painting. A doodle, a shaded drawing, a collage, a photograph with written commentary, a font-tastic entry. Anything. I’m sick of having great flashes of ideas and losing them over time without so much as jotting them down.

Ultimately I don’t think that any one of these things will dramatically change the course of my life, but I think it can definitely change the quality of it. Here’s hoping that maybe this year will be better than the last, and the more organized, sketch driven and musically aware version of myself is way more awesome. Hello 2010.

Greg & I ice skating on New Year’s Eve

At the moment I’m on my flight home from Charleston, SC – heading home after a truly wonderful Christmas with my family. I arrived on Christmas eve with the rest of the fam already on the ground, and headed for my Aunt’s house where the majority of the holiday festivities went down. Of course, the gift part of Christmas day was awesome. One of the MANY amazing gifts I received is this pair of tangeriney sweet pair of slippers:

made by em & sprout

Not to mention, the personalized cake pan from my Aunt T, beautiful original print from my cousins, Planet Earth on dvd (finally!!!) and great books all around! But of course, the gifts were only a fraction of the holiday experience. No trip to Charleston would be complete without indulging in the following meals:

tasty Christmas dinner…

Fried Shrimp (with Key Lime pie not pictured)

Bessinger’s barbeque…

While my friends and the boyf were shivering up north I was enjoying every moment in flip flops and a sweatshirt in the 50ish degree weather of the south. The time spent with my family was so long overdue and so comforting. Love was pouring out of every person I was around, and laughter was in every smile. Holidays like this one make me wish I was a little closer to all of these amazing people! If you’re one of my twitter friends you probably saw that every post of mine for the past two weeks talked about making gifts, which turned out pretty well:

I hope all of your holidays were just as awesome! Are your ready for the New Year? While taking a holiday I had the opportunity to really think about the past year, and the upcoming one and deliberate on my hopes and intentions for 2010. More on that next time =)

This year I’ve found myself with the Christmas Spirit in FULL FORCE. If I sing another Christmas carol I think the boyf is going to end it. I’ve boiled it down to a couple of reasons:

1. I finally found the Muppet Christmas Carol on DVD (thanks Amazon). I’ve been looking for this for years, especially since I don’t have a VHS player anymore. Best Christmas Movie EVER.
2. I haven’t seen my family in a long time. TOO long. Like, a year and a half too long. I’m ecstatic to see them come Christmas Eve.
3. I already have my Christmas present (this gorgeous laptop!), which is a mood elevator every time I look at it.

To channel some of this glee I made a gingerbread house for a museum charity fundraiser, which was way larger than it needed to be, but came out alright. I have a little dough left over to make another (smaller) one as a gift. I’ve also picked up some household holiday gear have a little bit of cheer in every room including a couple of large holiday mugs perfect for coffee and hot chocolate in front of the laptop:

and a set of prep bowls from Pier 1 for the large quantities of cookies I’ll be whipping up over the next two weeks:

We’ve put a tree up and put lights on it (colored lights for the first time in years!), but can’t decorate it much more because the cat has climbed it a couple of times, and all of those baubles would probably just throw her over the edge this year. I’ve picked up some of my favorite holiday songs on iTunes and have played them on repeat (top 3: Wham! – Last Christmas, Judy Garland – Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas, Mariah Carey – All I Want for Christmas is You) probably to everyone else’s distress. We even picked up a live wreath and hung it on the door today:

With all of this excitement Christmas itself is coming up on me pretty quickly, so I’d better get to gift making. Speaking of which – time to whip up a couple of “test cookies”. ;c)